24. Boxer, Brief, Commando, Whale Tail

Guest panelist Jason returns to help Phil and Jake further undress the List of Every Damn Thing by ranking the Boxer dog breed, the time-related concept of "brief", military commandos, and the tails of whales.

If you have something to add to the List of Every Damn Thing, let us know by sending an email to list@everydamnthing.net (or get at us on Twitter and Instagram).

SHOW NOTES:

• The Look Who’s Talking film franchise is of course available on DVD box set with bonus features. But we’re not going to give you a link to that.
• While there's evidence that Heathcliff the cat is a fan of pie, we couldn’t find proof that he steals them from windowsills. He's definitely guilty of something, though.
• Jake advanced his theory that everyone has either a country cousin or a city cousin. TV Tropes proves him right.
• The convoluted history / retconning of Nick Fury comes up in our discussion. In the Marvel comics, he started out as a WWII hero. Later stories about him took place in modern times, the idea being that he’d ingested a chemical that kept him (and his supporting cast) from aging. In the movies, they don’t want to have multiple characters who have been around since WWII and also since they cast a black actor as Fury, they can’t have him leading a platoon in WWII since the army wasn’t desegregated until after the war. Instead they just avoid it entirely and use Dum-Dum Dugan.
• In the only scene Phil remembers from the Commando movie, Schwarzenegger gets totally outfitted with stuff he got at a sporting goods store.
• Megaforce (1982) is a fantastic movie that Phil saw in the theatre as a kid. An older kid probably took him to see it, because it’s hard to imagine his parents being interested in it but he was only six when it came out. It’s kind of a GI Joe-adjacent story about super-commandos in spandex pants. In the climactic scene, the hero has to fly his motorcycle into a transport plane. In this episode, Jake claims that the motorcycle was fueled by chicken shit, but he was confusing Megaforce with Warlords of the Twenty-First Century which came out the same year.
• We muse a bit about Oreo stuf. Phil’s son recently told him about the Most Stuf Oreos, which would maybe go higher than Double Stuf Oreos on the List of Everything just in the name of absurdity. Here’s a recipe to make your own stuf at home. You’ll just have to go through this person’s dissertation about life to get to it.
• Whale Tail is a 2005 pornographic movie where all the women have thong underwear visible (prior to getting undressed presumably). Scott Nails is not only a porn actor, he’s also a voting activist. Here’s his twitter.
• When Phil said dolphins do things he doesn’t like, he’s referring to them being sexually aggressive with humans and each other. He knows that we can’t judge dolphins by human rules but people are out here saying they’re smarter than us. You can read about  cetacean intelligence here.
• About five years ago Jake and Phil went on a backpacking trek with some friends along the Lost Coast and camped near a giant, rotting whale carcass (with tail attached).
• Jake read the unabridged version of Moby-Dick, not the shorter version where they don’t spend whole chapters describing different types of whales.
• We discuss the eating of whale meat. In Japan, whale meat was used as a food source nationwide for the first time after the war. In the 50s they passed a law that school lunches should contain whale meat and the law was in effect through the 1980s.

ALSO DISCUSSED IN THIS EPISODE:
Scientology * the Westminster dog show * Cher * A Brief History of Time by Stephen Hawking * MacBeth * Scooby-Doo * Gravy SEALs * Sgt. Fury and his Howling Commandos * Snake-Eyes * Charmander (seen here chasing his tail) * Barry Bonds * Tommy Bahamas shirts * blowing up a beached whale * Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home * sardines

Below is the List of Every Damn Thing as of this episode (for the most up-to-date list, go here):

1. Dolly Parton - person
2. Clement Street in San Francisco - location
3. Prince - person
4. Cher - person
5. Donald Duck - fictional character
6. Hank Williams - person
7. air - substance
8. Watchmen - comic book
9. onions - food
10. “Midnight Train to Georgia” - music
11. sex - idea
12. Boxer (dog breed) - animal
13. ducks - animal
14. firefighters - people
15. Shakira - person
16. The Three Stooges - comedy act
17. Christmas trees - seasonal decoration
18. Trading Places - 1983 film
19. intro to “Back That Azz Up” - music
20. The Truman Show - movie
21. dilapidated shacks - structures
22. shirtless men wearing elaborate angel wings, gold lamé shorts & furry cha-cha heels - idea
23. plants - life form
24. handkerchiefs - accessory
25. nail clippers - tool
26. rye bread - food
27. cubed ice - substance
28. Antoni Gaudi - architect
29. Run the Jewels - music gro...