This is a story about popcorn, mostly. It's also about religion and weddings and cleaning. But mostly it's a story about microwave popcorn. It stars Matthew, who was sort of the villain of the story called "Flow." And if we're being honest, he's the villain of this story, too. But I love him. I hope you do as well.

👉The story begins at 2:00 and the tiny lessons begin at 15:12

👉You can find the transcript after the Credits!

👉Visit our website to download the Podcast User's Manual and find out more! https://alittleenglish.com/

A Little English is written, produced, recorded, edited, mixed, mastered and scored by Edward Cooper Howland.

All stories are either in the public domain, or written by me.

Copyright 2023 Edward Cooper Howland

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TRANSCRIPT:

Hi. My name is Cooper, and this is…A Little English. Every episode, I read a short story. After the story, there are three tiny lessons.

Before we begin, I’d like to say thank you for listening, and ask you to tell your friends about the show. I don’t do any advertising, so you spreading the word is really the only way that the audience can grow. Thank you so much!

Now

Where I come from, we were always taught that there are two things you don’t discuss at dinner: religion and politics. The reason for that is, because people will start shouting at each other. But this story opens with a conversation about religion. Ok it’s not a conversation, it’s people shouting at each other. But don’t worry. This is not really a story about religion. Actually it’s mostly about….popcorn?

Anyway, the name of this story is, “Alone,” which is also the name of my favorite song to sing at karaoke.

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“If it’s in a church, I’m not going,” said Matthew.

Mom and Dad were already dressed for the wedding. Dad was wearing his suit and Mom even put on earrings. They looked at each other and sighed. “He gets this from you,” said Mom.

Dad rested his head in his hands for a moment. Then he stood up and spoke to his son.

“Matthew, it’s a wedding.  Of course it’s in a church.”

“Well if it’s in a church, then I am not going. I will not worship your false gods. You’ll have to leave me here.”

“You don’t have to worship anything. Just sit there like a normal human being and then we go and have cake. It’s a party. It’s a celebration of love.”

“It’s a lie!” shouted Matthew. “It’s all lies! It’s a scam! They scare you with stories of hell and pain forever. Then they take your money.”

“Matthew, it’s a congregational church. They don’t have any money.”

“I don’t care! They get money for free and then they don’t pay any taxes!

It’s the biggest scam in the world. And if you go, or if I go, we are saying that this scam is okay. So you can do whatever you want, but I’m not going.”

“This is just some stupid stuff you saw on the internet. You need to get off the computer and get out in the real world.”

“I AM in the real world, Dad! I believe in  science and YOU PEOPLE believe in magic!”

“You don’t have to believe in the religion to go to a wedding, Matthew. You just go to support your family and friends on their big day.”

“I’m. Not. Going.” Matthew sat down on the floor.

His parents went to the living room. Matthew could hear them shouting at each other through the closed door. After a few minutes, they came out. Mom was fixing her eye makeup with a tissue. Dad spoke first.

“Fine. You’re fourteen years old...